I have seen the rain Header Title : I have seen the rain Genre: tragedy,angst,flashback to VietnameraCharacters: Murdock, Hannibal, Face, B.A., SusanRating: M (16+)Disclaimer :"The A-team" belongs to S.Carnell, I dont make money with this.Note: reference to the Song "I have seen the rain" by PinkSummary : Susan, a new nurse at the V.A., wants to find out more about Murdock and the reasons, why hes living in the V.A. at all.>Im still looking for someone to beatread it.Part 1 Today was Susan Taylors first day at the Veteran Asylum, a psyichatric hospital for former soldiers. She already had had a look at the files of some of patients, so she was familiar with those cases. Now she was waiting for the matron to show her the ward. The matron was a about fifty year old woman, who wore her grey hair in a tight knot. She looked the new nurse over with disdain. Miss Taylor, please follow me and listen caerfully, I dont like to repeat myself .Susan suppressed an urge to stand to attantion and salut. Then she obediantly followed her through the sterile corridor until the matron stopped in front of a door. This is the room of Mr.H.M. Murdock , he calles himself Howling Mad, but his real name is written down somewhere in his file. Its Henry Marcus, Susan added. The matron lifed her eyebrow in acknowlegement. I see you have done your homework.She knocked at the grid of the door.Mr. Murdock ?A terrified scream came from inside. The invasion of the extraterrestrials has begon !!! Run for your lifes !!!The matron opend the door just a bit. Murdock ? Im fireing all my torpedos and phasers ! A splash of water hit them when entering the room.Murdock was crouching behind his bed and a pile of pillows that looked like an improvised barricade, shooting at them with his waterpistol.He wore a selfmade cellophane triangel hat in order to keep the aliens from reading his mind. Mr. Murdock, may I introduce you to our new nurse , Susan Taylor ? Murdock popped up behind his pile of pillows. Greetings from outerspace, mon cherie !He theatrically raised his hat and smiled. Susan giggeld. Hello Mr. Murdock , nice to met you.Murdock had a closer look at her; the new nurse was very attrative, slim, tall, long, blonde hairthe kind of woman that would date Face, but never a nutcake like him.He would never be more than a patient to her, how frustrating.Nice to have met you, bye,Mr.Murdock, she said and left the room together with the matron.What exactly is wrong with Mr. Murdock, he just seems to be fooling a round ? She had read the diagnosis in his file and therefor expected worse than that.The older woman frowned. The difference between Murdock and someone just fooling around is, that he believes in what he does. He thinks his imaginary dog, Billy, is real like any other phantasie, he likes to talk about. He isnt able to care for himself, hes like a big child in a way. Sometimes he runs away with one of his former mates from Nam, but he always returns after a while. That guy often disguises himself, thinking we dont get it, it seems to be a kind of game for Murdock, or that guy is as crazy as he is. I dont know what they do, maybe they just go to the nearest pub to drink a beer and talk about old times. But I never saw relatives visiting him.Susan nodded. How can I get more information about him, his files says that he was a pilot in Vietnam whos been living here since the end of war. I dont know more than that file says, but maybe you can talk to that friend of his.Part 2After a while Murdock and Susan became friends, if friendship was possible between a patient and a nurse. He told her a lot of storys about the A-team and their fantastic assignments , which Susan liked to hear but never considert to be real. On a warm springday both were sitting on a bench in the hospital park. The trees were in bloom and you could already sense the summer in the air. Tell me , where do you get all those ideas from, I mean, the A-team and this storys you keep telling me ? You think, Im just an other freak, but I thought you really do believe me. He seemed hurt and disappointed.Murdock She looked at him with sympathy. Id really like to believe you, but nothing indicates that, for example, those people you mentioned, dont just exist in your head. Sure Face exists and hes going to visit me soon, then you can check wether hes real or not, he snapped.Two weeks later, Murdock was indeed visted by a man, matching his descriptions.Susan was putting clean sheets on his bed when the stranger entered his room.Hey, Face !, he called Thats Susan, I told you about her on the phone, shes our new nurse and you should really meet her ! She looked up to this very handsome man, who couldnt have been a product of Murdocks imagination, except for her starting to see ghosts, too. Hello Mr. Peck, Tempelton, Peck. He shoke her hand.Oh, well,if all the nurses here were as pretty as you, I wouldnt want to be sane any more, he flirted.Murdock gave him a warning and jealous look, which Susan didnt notice. Face understood.Mr.Murdock, I got to go, have a nice time with your friend.When Face left Murdocks room,Susan followed him. Please wait for a moment, Mr.Peck, Id like to ask you a question. Go ahead.Do you happen to know something about Murdocks family or what happened to him during the war ?Face hesitated for a moment, not knowing how much he could tell her.Well, I met him for the first time back in Nam, we served under Colonel John Smith on a special unite called the A-team, but he never told me anything about his family. The A-team exists ?! I thought Murdock made it up like this Colonel Decker whos chasing himOh, thats a long story, but why dont you come with me and meet the A-team in person ?Youre lucky, my luchbreak starts in five minutes. She followed Face two streets down until he stopped in front of a parked dark van with a red eyecatching red stripe on it. He opened the sideward door. May I introduce you to the A-team; the one with the cigar is the Colonel, we call him Hannibal, the one behind the wheel is B.A. And this is Susan, a nurse from the VA and a friend of Murdocks.Susan looked at them with disbelife. I thought you were just something existing in his imagination. Hey, man, Im real, I aint nothing that,that fool made up, man !, B.A. grumbeled.Hannibal smiled and put his cigar nonchalland into the corner of his mouth. Why dont you get in ?She hesitated, looking at the men.Dont be afraid, they are more harmless than they look, encouraged Face.Finally she climbed into the van. So you are his fellows from Vietnam ? Ive been wondering for a while about what happened to Murdock during the war, that turned him into what hes now. I thought, maybe you as his friends, could tell me anything to make me understand him better ?Hannibal slowly exhaled the smoke. You wanna know, why hes the way he is now, he said pensively I think I know the reason, but it isnt a pretty story, lady, I tell you, but itll answer your question, so if you wanna hear it, here we go. It goes back to one hot summerday in Vietnam.Part 3The convoy, which was transporting supplies to a village, was going slowly up the narrow and steep streets through the asian jungle. Colonel John Smith, nicknamed Hannibal after the famous strategic genius, cursed the jungle, the heat and the dust. He hated beeing there, but that wouldnt keep him from accomplishing his mission.Captain Murdock was sitting next to him, driving the small army truck and humming along the exotic music coming from the radio. The rough drive through holes and over stones didnt seem to interfere with his good mood. Fortunatly, this assignment promised to be more relaxing than the dangerous search and destroy missons or risky special operations, he and his team usual did.Leutnant Peck and Sergant Baracus were in the truck driving behind him, follwed by a jeep.Hannibal opened the window in order to let the cooling wind blow into his face and took a cigar from his pocket. This was much better, sometimes life could be pleasant even in the middle of a war. He smiled. The Captains good mood was contagious.Now, Murdock had stopped humming.The Colonel watched him; he was a still young officer in his midtwentys and despite his youth known as an extraordinary pilot. Hannibal could see it on the missons,when he flew them to their engagements. He might be a little crazy , but which sain person would volontier to join the Green Berets and go to Vietnam ? Cheerfully he blew the smoke into the sultry afternoon air. Murdock watched him from the corner of his eye. The Colonel was smiling in his typical impish way. He hadnt known him for a long time, but had the feeling, that his CO was a trustworthy , experienced man, sure Hannibal could feel that.In a distance they could see some cabins. Colonel, were going to be there in two minutes.Murdock slowed the truck down and drove into the village. The people were expecting them, women and children came out of the cabins, looking curiously at the foreign soldiers.Hannibal got out of the truck first, when suddenly the shooting started. He threw himself flat on the ground and took cover behind the truck. This was an ambush and they stepped right into it. Face and B.A. returned the fire, but there was no hope for the civilians. From a close distance Hannibal could watch a young woman beeing shot into the head, splashes of blood stained his uniform. Next to her a child broke down after taking a lethal hit. He tried to concentrate on the approching enemy soldiers.Murdock instinctivly had trown himself on the seat when the shooting started, now he was firing trough the open window at the jungel from where the Vietcong attacked.The windshield of the truck took a hit and shattered, spraying a rain of glasplinters all over Murdock. The bullet supposed to kill the Captain missed him for just an inch hitting the seat.Face took position behind the open door of the jeep firing MG-volleys at their uninvited guests. Hannibal moved torwards the jeep in order to support him.The tactical situation was critical, they were outnumbered by the enemy soldiers closing in.They couldnt take on a whole platoon all by themselves and soon they would run out of amonition. An other problem was the protection of the surviving civilians hidding in the cabins.He was trying to get a better picture of the situation, aguishly thinking about a plan to save his men. Bauer seemed to be dead, he was laying motionless on the ground, Anderson got an injury at his leg, he wouldnt make it. Face and B.A. were fine, holding their ground.But this couldnt last for long, the enemy had encircled them, coming closer and closer.The A-team was trapped. Some soldiers came out of the jungle, pointing their guns at Face and B.A., who slowly raised their hands and so did Murdock.Hannibal watch out ! Face suddenly yelled.The Colonel heard footsteps behind him. He turned around in a fast movement in order to grab the soldier sneaking up at him, but was hit hard on the temple by a rifle butt instead.He unconsiously sank to the ground.When Hannibal came to with terrible headaches, he was looking into a barrel of a machine gun.Dont move, Mister !, said the Vietcong soldier with a foreign accent in English.Hannibal stayed in his uncomfortable position with his hands and feets beeing tied up.What about my men ?, he mumbled dazed.The soldier just laught and kicked his rip. Hannibal tried to ignore the pain.Mistreating helpless people seems to be a hobby of yours, isnt it ?He smiled at him in a cocky way, which made the soldier kick him again. This time he couldnt avoid sighing in pain.Shut up ! or Ill stuff your mouth, Colonel. He put a disdainful emphasis on his rank.You mean Shut up , Sir, I still outrank you, Hannibal teased.But this was just the outside, a mask he wore that nobody could see behind. Inside he was trembling with fear but his innate actingtalent helped him to appeare more brave then he actually was.The leader of the Vietcong gestured to his men standing next to him and yelled some orders in his mouthertounge. Hannibal was grabbed and pulled to his feet by two of them.You will stop smiling soon., the soldier hissed into his ear.Then he was dragged towards one of the straw cabins. Hannibal fought against a wave of nauseness when he was brought into an upright position, he still hadnt recovered from that blow he took. The next shock was waiting for him in the almost dark cabin.Hannibal cleared his throat. It seemed as if talking was suddenly difficult for him.What Ill tell you now isnt easy to take. Dont think that I wasnt shocked, I.just concealed it better. Yes, I feared for me and you to die on that day in the jungle when I heard the shots.Face interrupted him. I saw what happenedehmnot actually saw, but heard it.I never talked about it before.Face had lost any idea about time when he came to.For a part of a secound, he was close to panic, because he couldnt see anything despite him feeling the hot sun burning on his naked arms. Then he realised that he had been blindfold with a black piece of cloth.Face rubbed his head over the ground in order to remove it; his hands and feets were tied up. Now he could see a small bit of his environment, but not enough to get a clear orientation.He heared footsteps, a woman screaming, soldiers shouting orders, a little child started crying then shooting and more screaming and yelling. The charivari continued and the shots werent far away from him.Face tried to lay absolutly still in order to avoid catching their attention.Sweat was running down his forehead. Where was the rest of his team ? He listened closely, hoping to make out their voices in that noise. Were they still alive ? He was close to panic again, had they been shot allready , was he going to be next ? Someone was coming closer, he could sense it. His heart started beating faster and he barely could lay still. Suddenly Face heard someone screaming with pain, he recognized it was Murdock.Inside the cabin, I had to face something terribel, Hannibal continued I still remember it when I see bamboofurniture or strewmats, I hate that stuff like hellHannibals eyes recognized Murdock in the semidarkness. The walls made of strew didnt let much light get into the cabin, but it really seemed to be dusk outside.He was crouching in a corner with his uniform torn.The hair was hanging dishevelled into his face,his eye was swollen and his lips were burstHannibal could see the bruised skin where the clothes were ripped. Are you ok, Murdock ?, he whispert, although he could see he was not.The Pilot weakly nodded.Colonel, where are the others ?I know Ill find a way to get us out of here I..One of the soldiers dragged him away from Murdock and pushed him on a chair. Then he tied him to it, while the other soldier was pointing a gun at him.Enough talking, he barked.Two more soldiers entered the cabin. They grabbed fightend Murdock and pushed him to the ground. One of them took out a knieve and cut off parts from his uniform.Hannibal knew what was going to happen next and turned his head away, but the soldier pushed it back in order to make him watch.Youll watch, we do it just for you.He felt the cool metal of the gun pressed against his neck and swallowed the sarcastic remark. Then he was forced to watch with a mixture of disgust and faszination the terrible things, they did to the young pilot.Murdock screamed and cried.He just couldnt watch this without doing something.His fingertips reached for the rops trying to find a way to lossen them at least a little. But the bigger problem was the gun pointed at him, otherwise he would have gotten up and started to fight.No doubt they wouldnt hesitate to pull the trigger, if he moved. Maybe Face and B.A. were already dead. He felt sympathy for Murdock, who had to endure this just because he couldnt protect him. It made him so angry. If only he couldn help him somehowMurdock, youll get through this , everthing will be fine, I promise, Ill take you back homewell leave the army after this shit is over and start a new life in L.A., we could found an organisation and work freelance he just babbled something hoping that the sound of his voice might give him strength. The soldiers didnt seem to understand him, because they let him talk and didnt show any reaction.Murdock cried and whimpered, so he was still alive.The Colonel was sure that they would be killed as well, there was no reason to let them live after they became witnesses of the massacre and they were enemy soldiers, that was what the rational part of his mind told him.Only a miracle would have saved us.. , Hannibal closed.But the miracle was already on its way, Face continued. I was grabbed by some soldiers andFace felt that a couple of hands grabbed him and pulled him up, then he was lifed and carried away. He couldnt tell because of the bildfold, but it seemed to be night. Suddenly, he was dropped on the floor. Face groaned. But that was just the beginning; out of the blue fists started to punch him and he was kicked by many feet. He curled up in order to protect him from the beating. After an eternaty, to Face it seemed even longer, they stopped. His whole body ached, so he could barely move. A hand was run softly through his blond hair.He heard a low female voice, then his blindfolt was removed. Now, Face was looking at a pretty asian soldier smiling friendly at him. Oh, hello ; if Id known that Ill meet you today, I would have dressed up, he tried to flirt, but the woman gave him a confused look. Never mind.He smiled at her winningly.Out of the blue, she bent in for a kiss. Her soft lips touched his mouth.Why couldnt all the soldiers be that nice, Face thought, after all he was a follower of the make love not war idea , but unfortunatly the Vietcong had a different motto.Suddenly, he saw a flash of light reflected from a blade in the semidarkness, which made him instinctivly flich away from her.The woman shook her head and tried to calm him, pointing at the robs around his wrists and angles. She wanted to free him ? He gave her a sceptical look.In a guesture, she put a finger on her mouth. Be quiet ? Face gave her a questioning look.From outside , they could hear some male voices calling and engines beeing started.A single voice yelled an order. The woman hurried to cut through the robs and shouted an answer in her mothertounge. After guesturing him to be quiet and stay were he was, she ran out of the cabin. Face could hear the enginesound getting lower in the distance . They flew.Befor he left the cabin, he waited for a while listening in order to make sure , that they were really gone. Slowly he got up. The Leutnant had to find out wether his teammates were still alive. A lamp was hanging from the ceiling, which Face took off and lighted it with some matchsticks he found on a cupboard. The place between the cabins, filled with dead bodys, was a horrible sight. As far as he could see, they all had gunshootwounds.Face was thankful for the darkness and the dime candellight so he didnt have to have a closer look at them. He disgustedly climbed over them.He reached a cabin and dragged the curtain, which was there instead of a door.empty and so were the other three ones. But then he was lucky to find Hannibal inside the fourth cabin.He was tied to a chair, sleeping or at least pretanding to be. Colonel, its me Face !His eyes opened at once. Is the coast clear ?, he whispert.Face nodded. They are gone, but unfortunatly our vehicles, too. I dont know how to get us some new ones out here.He spotted Murdock lieing curled up in a corner with his uniform in ragges.What the matter with him ?Hannibal shoke his head, not now.After Face had freed Hannibal and Murdock , who was unsually silent, they found B.A. tied up and blindfolt in an other cabin. Outside it was dawning.Outside it was dawning. In the morning sunrise, the bodys, now crawling with flies and the first maggots starting to feed on them, were an even more horrible sight. Anderson was among the dead women and children. Face watched Hannibal wrinkel his nose in disgust, then putting a hand over it.Lets go, men, heres nothing left to do for us.B.A. gave Hannibal a surprised look. Hey man, why didnt ya tell me what happened to poor Murdock ? Id killed that suckers who did that to him !Hannibal looked to the floor. I just tried to forget it, but sure Murdock couldnt. After a rescueparty had found us, he was taken to the hospital in our camp. I asked the doctors about his condition, but never really got an answer.Then I was told that he was physically fit again but wouldnt be able to go on duty, if he wouldnt recover from trauma soon. They let me visit him, but the person I saw wasnt Murdock anymore. He behaved like a small child, playing with toys, painting pictures with crayon and all the time he was mumbling to himself or talking to people or things which werent their at all. The doctors mentioned something about regression, that he tried to cope with the situation by becoming a child again. After two month, he was well enough to fly us to our Hanoi-mission, but he had changed somehow. When he was back home, he had a nervousbreakdown.I was told that he was standing on the roof of a building, screaming that he could fly like a bird, people were afraid that he might jump, thats why he was taken to the V.A. Since that day, hes like we all know him now, Hannibal closed.Something he never talked about were his feelings to have let Murdock down on that day in the jungle.He was his commanding officer and supposed to protect him.He should have sensed the trap, he hadnt been careful enough, this he could never forgive himself.But could one really protect someone in a war ?Susan swallowed hard. Thank you for telling me this, I think, I understand now.She had a look at her watch. My break has ended thirty minutes ago. Hannibal nodded. Please visit us anytime, Murdocks friends are friends of the A-team as well.In thougths , she got out of the van. Susan was feeling sorry for Murdock, whod been through a lot. She would take good care of him.the end